I'm going to be honest with you. Soon, I'll be teaching at an arts camp for two weeks, and the decision to unhook from my blog, social media, emails or to not unhook from it all and check in now and then is still undecided. Part of me wants to relax into my teaching and focus. The other part of me wants to leave the door open to return to the familiarity and routine of blogging a bit and sharing ideas because it's in my habits that I find myself again. Or is it?
We shall see.
In the meantime, I wanted to share this with you. I've been knitting quite a bit. I just finished a cowl for a friend. It's a golden tan color, 100% cotton from Italy. It was a funny yarn to knit because it's very slim in some places and bulkier in others. Once I got the hang of it, though, it was really fun to make.
I hope she likes it.
And I'm knitting my first baby blanket. When I was little I had a blanket that I carried around with me. I loved it and was super attached to it. I can still remember the silkiness of its edges as I ran my fingers along its sides and fell asleep. The blanket brought me a sense of instant calm.
Knitting this blanket today, using white and coral colored cotton yarn, I'm experiencing a similar sense of serenity. Sometimes I'll take a moment in between rows just running my fingers over the swath as it gets longer and longer. And I'm even starting to think about making myself my own blanket from the same yarn when I'm done.
What is it about knitting and the yarn that brings such quiet to the soul? I'm still a fledgling knitter, having picked it up last summer and only, to this day, having knit cowls and scarves. But I'm smitten. If I knit scarves for the rest of my life, I'll be content. It brings me peace, the act of knitting does. When I'm feeling confused about a decision I have to make, stressed about a situation, I sit down and knit a row. Then things are a bit clearer.
It's different than going to the studio to dance around, going for a walk to take photographs or freewriting for 15 minutes. It's an immediate, tactile experience with something that brings me comfort and ushers in memories of when I first began to feel the softness of fabrics and find comfort in them. It's soft, forgiving, messy but always straight and forward-leading, yarn is.
Knitting the baby blanket is meditative. I imagine all of the moments from now until I've finished that will be woven into the blanket in some way. Will my niece know that the first 10 rows were knit one Sunday evening while watching TV with my husband, or that this row here was knit after hearing some bad news? No, she will not. Well, she will if she reads this blog post, if it's still up! But you know what I mean.
There are memories for me in the blanket with each stitch. And as I hold it in my hands and the blanket gets wider and longer, the memories do too.
So as I prepare to teach and debate about whether or not to unhook so I have the energy and time to hook myself into teaching, I'm glad I have the blanket with me - a grounding force. It will be a comfort to me as I wade into the adventure of teaching dance.
And I suppose my question - to unhook or not to unhook - might best be answered by sitting down and knitting some more. So we shall see if I'll see you back here soon. If not, I'm wishing you well this summer and sending you waves of creative joy and gratitude for visiting my blog and reading my words. xx